10: Balance and Composure- The Things We Think We're Missing (No Sleep)
Balance and Composure surprises everybody (aka me) by proving they're capable of writing good songs not titled "Quake". Holy shit! Who'da thunk?
Listen to "Tiny Raindrop"
9: Defeater- Letters Home (Bridge 9)
Yeah so Defeater put out a new album this year I guess. The first and last song are wicked bangers and everything else on the album was pretty tight from what I gathered. So yeah, moving along.
Listen to "Bastards"
8: A$AP Rocky- Long.Live.A$AP (ASAP Worldwide)
I thought this was the most ignorant shit I'd ever heard in my life until I heard that A$AP Ferg album. So I guess this is the second most ignorant shit I've ever heard in my life. Cool.
Listen to "Wild for the Night"
7: Nails- Abandon All Life (Southern Lord)
This shit sounds like a heavily intoxicated Lemmy from Motorhead driving a cement truck through a fucking TNT factory. If that isn't a ringing enough endorsement for you, then you're probably soft as shit and you can kiss my ass.
Listen to "God's Cold Hands"
6: Danny Brown- Old (Fool's Gold)
SMOKIN' AND DRINK. DRINKIN' AND SMOKE. SMOKIN' AND DRINK. DRINKIN' AND SMOKE. SMOKIN' AND DRINK. DRINKIN' AND SMOKE. SMOKIN' AND DRINK. DRINKIN' AND SMOKE.
Listen to "Dope Fiend Rental"
5: Kanye West- Yeezus (Roc-A-Fella/Def Jam)
I was gonna be a troll and put this album at number one, but then like six other turdburgling publications beat me to it. I wonder what kind of people thought this shit was "too experimental"? Probably the same people who don't listen to Nails. Fucking posers.
Listen to "I'm In It"
4: Coliseum- Sister Faith (Temporary Residence)
Full disclosure: I don't even like this album half as much as I liked House With a Curse. Yeah, I don't really know what else to put here, other than "this album is still pretty good I guess..." or maybe; "2013 was a mediocre year for music."
Listen to "Doing Time"
3: The Men- New Moon (Sacred Bones)
I don't know why nobody's jocking the shit out of this album, considering how mental people went for Open Your Heart. Oh well. For full enjoyment, I recommend blasting this album while driving 140 km/h through the wasteland between Mississauga and Kitchener in the late winter/early spring.
Listen to "I Saw Her Face"
2: J. Cole- Born Sinner (Dreamville)
Half of this album is kind of dumb, but there are like six songs on it that make me weirdly emotional every time I listen to them. Plus the guy's an insane lyricist, a pretty good producer, and makes hit singles that kick ass. Oh yeah, and if you don't like "Power Trip" you're probably a soul-less reptilian scumbag.
Listen to "Trouble"
What? Wanna fight about it?
Listen to "Wu-Tang Forever"
~ ~ ~
Hon. mention: A$AP Ferg- Trap Lord, Drug Church- Paul Walker, Mr. Muthafuckin' eXquire- Kismet, Rescuer- With Time Comes the Comfort, Daylight- Jar, Mac Miller- Watching Movies With the Sound Off, Deniro Farrar- The Patriarch vol. 1.
Touche Amore/Pianos Become the Teeth- Split
Xerxes- Would You Understand?
Safeplace- Little Terror
Tigers Jaw/Code Orange Kids/Self Defense Family/The World is...- 4-Way Split
Self Defense Family- The Corrections Officer in Me
~ ~ ~
"Boner Jamz 2013" the playlist
Songs Grooveshark didn't have:
Defeater- "Bled Out"
Drug Church- "Attending a Cousin's Birthday Party"
NAH- "Slime People"
Safeplace- "Little Terror"
Self Defense Family- "Pop Song Written on the Automall"
Weekend Nachos- "You're Not Punk"